With the fifth episode of “American Horror Story: Apocalypse” taking place entirely before the end of the world, “Boy Wonder” was more like a “Coven” sequel, complete with a Stevie Nicks cameo and a not too subtle battle of the sexes.
Cordelia’s vision of getting eaten alive. Photo courtesy of FX Networks via tvguide.com
This episode of “AHS” picks up where last week’s left off, with Cordelia’s (Sarah Paulson) vision of herself getting eaten by creatures at a destroyed Miss Robichaux’s Academy. Once the vision ends and she wakes up, she tells Langdon (Cody Fern) and the not-Hogwarts council that she’ll administer the Seven Wonders during the Blood Moon (the first of hopefully few references to my least favorite season, “Roanoke”).
While yelling at Cordelia for letting a man attempt the Seven Wonders, Myrtle tells her about Mallory’s revival of a dead deed. We see Mallory, looking much more ethereal than she does when she’s with Coco, not only bring the deer back to life, but she turns it into a baby fawn. Myrtle explains “Mallory did not just heal the wounds, she undid them,” which has me confident I know how this season is going to end. I’m willing to bet that at the last minute, Mallory will reset the world to before Langdon’s rise to power and end him once and for all. With the hourglasses playing so heavily into this season’s marketing, I wouldn’t be surprised if time travel is a big component.
We get Coco’s backstory as a witch. Her one superpower is to detect gluten, but that’s apparently enough magical talent for Cordelia when Coco’s father donates “zillions of dollars” to the school. Ms. Robichaux’s still has bills to pay. I can’t be sure until the end of the season, but so far I feel like Coco is a real waste of screen-time. I almost wish she wasn’t a witch so her campiness could have concluded at her death in episode 3.
The witches’ school is so bright and nice, while the warlocks’ underground wannabe-Hogwarts is dark and sullen, just in case anyone was confused about the metaphors being thrown around.
The four warlocks in charge of Hawthorne School. Photo courtesy of tvmoviefix.com
Langdon’s initiation by the warlocks gives off prep school “A Separate Peace” vibes, but John (Cheyenne Jackson) doesn’t trust him, so packs his bags to visit Cordelia. One of the warlock teachers (Billy Porter) tries to stop him and forever proves that warlock fights are much lamer than the witch fights, with John using some bad CGI to throw him against the wall and storming out.
He doesn’t get far, because while filling his car with gas, Kathy Bates slices his heels, stabs his chest and sets him on fire. I’m fairly sure in this scene Bates is Langdon’s satanic foster mother, but she could very well be the “Westworld”-like robot. Her timeline is kind of confusing. Langdon meets up with her in the woods and he lays out his plan to destroy the coven from within and take over the world.
Just like when the Seven Wonders were explained in “Coven,” the tests are shown in a silent movie scene with subtitles explaining the different powers. Langdon effortlessly performs them all, but for the final test, ascending to and from Hell, Cordelia asks him to bring back Misty Day (Lily Rabe). The warlocks think she’s playing gender games and setting him up for failure, but Cordelia shuts that down real quick, reminding them she outranks them all. The overt feminism of “Coven” is back with “Apocalypse” and I’m not complaining one bit.
Stuck in Hell since the end of season 3, “Coven’s” Misty Day returns. Photo courtesy of FX Networks
In case anyone’s forgotten, while attempting to perform the Seven Wonders in Season 3, Misty was unable to escape Hell and made to forever relive her worst nightmare — dissection day at school, where she brings a dead frog back to life and is forced to kill it by the teacher. The endless cycle finally breaks when Langdon shows up and slices the teachers stomach open. He brings her back from the dead with some equally poor CGI as she appears from thin air on the floor.
Cordelia and Myrtle talk with Misty, admitting they’ll never let Langdon be the Supreme; they just wanted to see how powerful he was. As a ‘thank you’ (and also probably a ‘sorry for sending you to Hell’) Cordelia calls Misty’s favorite artist who’s also a witch, Stevie Nicks, to come and sings “Gypsy” in a scene that’s nothing but fan service, complete with Misty’s signature shawl-spinning move. It went on a little too long, but I’m sure diehard Fleetwood Mac fans were swooning across the country.
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Billy Porter hears Cordelia enlist Madison (Emma Roberts) to go digging for dirt on Landgon and demands to tag along. With no other choice, Madison agrees and asks what makes the address Cordelia handed her so important. I knew it was coming, but I still literally gasped when they revealed the destination: season one’s Murder House.
“Boy Wonder” was a pretty solid episode of “AHS.” It wasn’t as amazing as last week’s episode, but that might be because I thought last week was the best episode of all eight seasons. With Misty back, the witches are all finally reunited and I don’t miss any of the characters from Outpost at all.
Next week is not only Sarah Paulson’s directorial debut, but it’s also Jessica Lange’s long awaited “AHS” return!
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